Type One
Honest, responsible, practical, and hardworking. Ones are noble changemakers who have an inner drive to improve the world and make it a better place for all. They can instantly see what needs to be enhanced and are usually the ones to do it. The challenge with this is that because they can believe that everything needs to be “better”, it can leave them feeling as though nothing is ever quite good enough. They have an internal compass as straight as an arrow, but sometimes forget that it’s not the direction everyone must follow. They are well-organized, have high standards, and appreciate structure but can slip into perfectionism if it is all taken too seriously. Their inner critic, which may be more accurately described as an inner judge, harshly calls out their “mistakes” and directs them on how things “should” be done.
Overview of Type 1
Core fear: To feel bad or wrong and be without integrity
Core desire: To feel virtuous and be good, right, and balanced
Focus of attention: What’s right/wrong - identifying what you feel should be corrected (errors and imperfections) and improving them
Limited belief: I’m not able to be loved or considered perfect unless I am good, responsible, and do things the right way
Liberated knowing: I am able to make mistakes and be loved perfectly and wholly as I am
Strengths: Truthful, sensible, diligent, dependable, inspiring, noble, discerning, wise
Blind spots: Intrinsic perfection and self-kindness
Three part defense system:
Defense mechanism: Reaction formation - replacing your own negative feelings that you see as unacceptable with the positive opposites that you believe are acceptable
Avoidance pattern - Mistakes
Idealized self-image - "I am good"
Enneagram Ones use the defense mechanism of reaction formation to avoid mistakes and maintain the idealized self-image of being "good". The idealized self-image is who our type structure believes we need to be, and we can unconsciously or consciously avoid anything that challenges this image. As a One learns to express their anger, and knows that anger can actually be good and right, it deepens connection within themselves and with others.
Mental healing & growth:
Moving from habit of mind to holy idea - judging to perfection
Judging - An evaluating mind that dictates what is good, better, best, and thinking that you know the right way
Holy perfection - Knowing that all of life is what it is and that in itself is perfect, which allows you to embrace everything with total acceptance
Emotional healing & growth:
Moving from passion to virtue - anger to serenity
Anger - Felt and expressed as resentment, frustration, self-righteousness, or irritation at things not being as they should be
Serenity - A willingness to accept that everything is as it should be, which allows you to experience patience and calmness
Coping strategies
True Self
Lovingly (even jokingly) challenge the inner critic to expand your viewpoints
Befriending imperfection
Having compassion for the fear of making mistakes
Learning to see things in color, not just black/white
Practicing emotional spontaneity and prioritizing having fun
Type Structure
Criticizing yourself and others
Holding yourself and/or others to impossibly high standards
Procrastination
Being rigid, inflexible, and living by a set of rules
Controlling your feelings, needs, and impulses
Creating emotional safety with a 1
Reassure them that you love them in their mess
Don’t be critical of them, be curious
Follow through on what you say you are going to
Express your acceptance and forgiveness
Reminders as a 1
Lean into acceptance and forgiveness
Learn to see “wrongdoings” as differences
Share your impulse and desires
Relax, play, and be spontaneous
Shift from black/white thinking and explore the grey
Making mistakes makes you human
You are lovable
Breaking the stereotypes
People can think I…
Am critical and judgmental
Can't be playful and spontaneous
Have unattainable standards
Believe I'm always right
Am cold and rigid
The whole truth is I…
See your potential and want to help get you there
Love to have fun and am discovering how to let go of the "should's" that prevent it
Am learning to be accepting of what is
Want to be fair
Can be very warm and flexible
“Embrace the glorious mess that you are.”
— Elizabeth Gilbert